By: Haja Hawa Koroma

Dear readers, let’s be honest, how many times have we looked at someone else’s relationship and wished our partners treated us the same way. Can you remember the number of times you have looked at someone else’s partner’s body and wished that your partner had that kind of banging body.

If we are really being honest, we’ve all done it, perhaps once or countless times than we wish to admit and it’s really not that big of a deal.

You can be in a relationship with someone and find other people attractive that are natural, just because we are in a relationship do not mean our feelings are strictly channeled into the one person we are dating, but the problem is you acting on that attraction.

 It is very important for one to have self-control and self-discipline. Yes! We cannot control feeling drawn or attracted to someone other than our partner but that does not mean we should act on those attractions.

My dearest readers, it is important that we try to understand that finding someone else attractive while you are in relationship is normal, there’s no point in denying it and it also does not mean you want to act on that attraction or maybe you do but that’s not my place to say or judge for that matter. Men tend to act more on that attraction than women.

Most women often deny themselves of such feelings for societal judgments, but again most women act on satisfying their desires and tend to act on these attractions. As tempting as that sounds, it’s not always a black and white issue, it’s a lot more complicated than that.

Fueling your desires is important, after all life is short so a lot of people tend to think that they should not deprive themselves from acting on their desires, but first ask yourself is this sexy stranger worth it?  For those in a committed relationship, the rush of cheating and not getting caught is exhilarating, it’s exciting, the thrill of “tasting another soup” as men say, is orgasmic, no pun intended. You must ask yourselves whether this engagement is worth losing your relationship over.

Dry spells is no stranger  to those in a long term committed relationship, there are times where you are not sexually attractive to your partner and it’s normal, and it’s mostly during times like that the attraction to another person other than your partner is heightened.

I’m not here to tell you not to act on those desires nor will I judge you if you do, but ask yourself is it worth destroying the relationship you’ve built over the years? Is that attraction so strong that it consumes you and it is all you think about? If it’s that’s strong, if you feel it transcends something much more than mere attraction then perhaps you should go for it, only if you are sure that it is worth destroying your relationship over, maybe your current partner is not treating you right and you are certain of something different and healthy for you.

Who knows, you may have your happy ending, so you may take the jump but it is not advisable to lead your partner on or flirt with the person you are attracted to when you are not completely sure of your decision, so don’t be on the fence with such issues.

If you feel it’s nothing more than just attraction, there’s nothing more to it,   then don’t ruin everything you’ve built for years over just few minutes of pleasure, again, it’s a decision that you alone can make because no matter what anyone tells you, you alone know what’s best for you and you alone know what your feel. So you are the best person to determine these factors for yourself as nobody understands ‘you’ like ‘you’ do.

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